In today’s society, the prevalent dismissal of childhood emotions by parents not only hinders emotional development but also contributes to mental health and attachment issues. Childhood is often painted with bright colors, cheerful laughter, and playful mischief. It is the age when one can be themselves without the fear of judgment or criticism of society and the people around us. However, I don’t recollect any instance, or at least from my childhood when I was gently comforted while I cried rather than just having my feelings dismissed as invalid. And I believe it was not only my story but a common one shared by many individuals. The reality is, we were never encouraged to express our true emotions. During an age when we should be free to express ourselves without any restrictions, we were bound to keep quiet and pretend to be happy. Whenever we shed tears out of something, they dismissed us stating that crying was a negative behavior. Especially for boys, the age-long stereotype that boys shouldn’t cry has impacted thousands of boys.  As a result, many boys may struggle with expressing their emotions openly, which can have long-lasting effects on their mental and emotional well-being. According, to society, strong kids don’t cry and we have to be strong and resilient regardless of the circumstances. We can only anticipate what impact it had on a child who barely knew the concept of strength. Consequently, many of us now fear being in tears, afraid of being labeled as a coward for crying. Crying is the purest form through which one brings out those unexpressed grieves yet the freedom was snatched from many children.

Today’s youth often struggle to acknowledge their mistakes instead they readily project on others without reflecting upon their faults. For instance, they might say “I am not a bad person, I did this because the other person was bad.” They cannot comprehend the fact that they might be mistaken too. And do we know the reason?  The reason is our parents and our guides never taught us to take responsibility for our childhood actions. We vividly remember they blamed those inanimate objects when we fell or caused harm to ourselves rather than holding us accountable. Furthermore, this habit of deflecting blame upon others hampered our opportunities for personal growth and the capacity for self-reflection and improvement.

Since our childhood, we were only taught about one emotion i.e. happiness. As a result, youths are now hesitant to express their hidden emotions to society because they knew staying happy was the only acceptable response to any situation. Isn’t it ironic that our society never really allowed us to express fear, cry, or be sad yet now they automatically expect us to be strong and exhibit any obstacles life throws at us? The underlying cause of teenagers going to depression is that they were never given the exposure to cope with life’s challenges. In our childhood, there were days when we felt distressed for various reasons, there were days when we just wanted to cry and not do anything. Regardless of the days, may be one or two or three but at least we knew we would eventually be relieved without depending on anyone. However, our emotions were always discouraged terming them as ‘invalid’. Consequently, children who grew up under such circumstances now seek validation from everyone around them to confirm the legitimacy of their emotions. If we were genuinely permitted to feel and process our emotions, perhaps we would now not rely on others to heal us.

Our parents always knew that life is not always a bed of roses. There will be days when sadness, tears, regret, disgust, and a plethora of emotions will be experienced. They might have also experienced those emotions but the constant pressure of society to remain resilient in all the circumstances made them emotionally inactive. This pressure could explain why our parents never showed sadness or cried in front of us, as they likely viewed crying as a sign of weakness. This might be the probable reason why they discouraged us from dwelling in sadness because they were under the illusion that strong people are always smiling.

Is it possible for any human being to just be happy? What will be the difference between a dead and a human body if one is not given the freedom to express their emotions? Perhaps that’s the reason why so many of us have become sensitive in this age, our minds are filled with countless insensitive messages. In today’s society, when we experience sadness and lack the motivation to engage in activities, it can feel almost taboo to allow ourselves to feel sad and idle, as we’ve been conditioned since childhood to believe that sadness is unacceptable.

However, seeking medical help is essential in severe cases but that’s a different aspect here, we are talking about the emotions that were never permitted to be voiced. Take your time; if you find it difficult to cope, there are experts to assist. Happiness is the ultimate goal of life. But without experiencing the wave of sadness, tears, and distress we can never understand the true significance of happiness. I am not advocating glorifying sadness and playing the victim but rather suggesting allowing people their space to be in their comfort zone. You can never replace your sentiments without processing the previous emotions. Therefore, it is necessary to embrace and experience them fully.

Those suppressed, silenced, neglected childhood sorrows hamper the psyche of a child often resulting in the child growing up to be emotionally vulnerable and not recognizing what they are feeling. Such children fear expressing their emotional sentiments with their parents which causes them to predispose their emotions within themselves further leading to a severe state of depression and anxiety attacks. It is significant for teachers, parents, and caregivers to understand and validate those emotions of children and create a nurturing atmosphere where children feel safe to express their emotions authentically. By fostering a culture of acceptance and accountability for our actions we can navigate our youths toward a new road of resilience and integrity. Through open communication, validation, and empathy we can help children understand the full spectrum of emotions allowing them to live a fulfilling life and grow in a healthy atmosphere where they feel heard and noticed. Rather than considering our sensations a burden, we must learn to embrace them as an integral part of our being.